One Tree Hill Life Lessons

I've been watching One Tree Hill recently and it has gotten me to thinking about lessons I've learned from the

show. One Tree Hill has relationships, thoughts and events that really make you think about your own life. Now some of you may be laughing at me thinking I'm dumb to take life lessons from a TV show, but One Tree Hill to me is more than a TV show. I've grown up with that show watching it through high school and

college.Many of the quotes I turn to for inspiration or guidance are from this show. Like this quote below, 

we have to continue to believe in our dreams and wishes if we want them to come true because we never know when that might happen. I often forget to believe in my dreams, instead choosing to believe I am foolish for believing in something that will never come true, but this quote reminds me if I want it to happen I have to always carry it with me and believe. It's not easy to keep a dream in your heart, especially when everything and everyone is telling you you should give up, but it wouldn't be a dream if it came easily. A dream is something that has to be worked for so when it comes to fruition we realize how lucky we are to have it come true.

Another Quote that sticks with me is this one:

In life we often become obsessed with the end result instead of the journey we take to get there. We become so concerned with finding the perfect job, finding our true love, getting married and starting a family, we forget to enjoy all the mistakes and all the twists and turns that get us to the destination. This quote reminds me that every mistake, every fall, every adventure is part of the journey. if you let fear hold you back you might miss out on a better destination than the one you wind up at.

Along the same lines of worrying and fearing the journey is the obsession of happiness as a destination. The quote below describes what's wrong with thinking of happiness as a destination.  

We're taught that we need to be happy and that it is something you can search out an attain by having the right things or the right job or the right partner, but happiness doesn't work that way. One Tree Hill reminds me that true happiness is a mood not a place that you can arrive at. You can't picture happiness as being achieved by having the right job, or the right house, or the right amount of money. If you picture happiness that way then you may never be happy. Happiness is a mood it's not always there it comes and goes like any mood, but if you view it as a mood instead of a destination you may just find happiness more often.

If you find yourself unhappy or afraid or your life not where you want it think of this quote:

I think of all the time we waste trying to figure out why our life if where it is and try to put the blame on others but the truth is we are where we are because of ourselves. We can try and blame life, circumstances, fate whatever target we find to blame, or we can accept that we shape our own life. Life may not always be fair but if we fight back and chase after what we want we can achieve our dreams. Every choice we make every, every decision we decide takes us a step further on the path. So make the right choices if you want to stay on the right path because if you wind up on one you don't want to be you have no one to blame but yourself.

The Last lesson and one of the firsts One Tree Hill taught me is this one:

The fact of life is we are all struggling with something in our lives. Each person you meet is battling something that you may have no idea what it is. Remember that the next time you insult someone or judge someone. We have no idea what each other is going through and the struggles that each other faces. It can make a person feel incredibly alone to know that they are just one of many fighting through life. If you can find that one person, doesn't matter who they are if they are a friend, family, significant other, the journey will seem a little less lonely and scary. All you need is one to make you feel connected to the world and remind you you can make it through.

In life we are struggling to find the answers and find the help to make it through. Some people turn to God, some people turn to science, some people turn to books. I turn to anything that sticks with me, whether it's a tv show, a book, a person, history, myself. Anything that can help make sense of this journey we are on I gather and store in my mind for those times I begin to doubt and wonder what I'm working for. Whatever you may turn to I hope it reminds you to enjoy the journey and not be afraid.

On a Search

Hello to all! Welcome to my blog! first let me start by  introducing myself. My name is Kristen and I'm a 20 something year-old from Ohio. Like many 20 year-olds I'm on a mission to find my place in life and to figure out what I should do with my it. I graduated from college so am now being pressured to find a job, any job that will give benefits and what not. I find the job search a difficult process because I am terrified of being trapped into a job that I hate. In my current job I have the freedom to travel, to pursue my interests, to do other things besides work; but the job pays next to nothing, has no benefits, and no room for growth. I decided to start this blog because I wanted a place where 1) I could get back into writing 2) have an outlet for my thoughts and 3) share and connect with others. I must add that besides being a college graduate with no "big kids" job I battle clinical depression and anxiety on a daily basis. I also have an incredible self-loathing for myself while at the same time a type-A personality, which means I beat myself up over every little failure in life. I go through highs and I go through lows. Some days when a depression bout hits it's a struggle to find a reason to get out of bed. I'm sharing this with you all because I want to share with others my story. I'm not going to whine or bitch about my life but simply share with you my thoughts. I know many of you out there battle what I battle with. It's a comforting thought to know I am not alone and thoughts that I have don't make me crazy and are shared by others. I'm hoping to hear from others and make this Blog an open, honest and safe place for everyone.

 Depression isn't being sad or hating your life or seeking attention. I know I am very blessed in my life and there are people out there worse off then me. I don't want to be depressed but when an episode occurs I have no control. I know many of you out there know I'm talking about. An episode is usually triggered by some event no matter how small. When an episode starts I become a person I don't like in the least. I beat myself up constantly, I cry over everything, I sleep all the time, I do nothing but hide in my house and ignore the world. When the episode ends I am so ashamed of myself because of the way I acted. there is a possibility that I may suffer from some type of Bipolar, which I am looking into. I am lucky because I am surround by many people that love me, stand by me during my episodes, and attempt to understand. I am even more blessed to have people in my life that are battling similar conditions and truly understand what is going on in my head. I take medication and am in the process to finding someone to talk to, but as many of you know medication and therapy only helps manage the symptoms. You have to fight yourself constantly and it's exhausting but it's what has to happen. I decided that it was time to get back into the world of writing and start by sharing a bit of myself with the world. I am working on not being ashamed of my struggle but to embrace and be proud of who I am. Many of you out there are battling the same things as me so my hope is that by sharing my story I can make others feel not as alone, feel less ashamed, and start the journey to healing. 

      
A little insight about the name of my blog, it came from my Favorite movie Breakfast at Tiffany's. I think Holly Golightly sums up the feelings of depression and  anxiety best when she says:
        "You know those days when you've got the mean reds.... the blues are because you're getting fat or maybe it's been raining too long.  You're sad, that's all.  But the mean reds are horrible.  You're afraid and you sweat like hell, but you don't know what you're afraid of.  Except something bad is going to happen, only you don't know what it is."
We all get cases of the mean reds some more than others. Right now I feel like I am in a constant state of the mean reds because so much of my life is in a state of confusion or limbo. I'm terrified of the job search, of growing up, where my relationship is going, that I'm letting life get away from me. Simply put I'm afraid of everything and constantly afraid that every decision I make is the wrong one. Breakfast at Tiffany's is my favorite movie because the character of Holly is as lost as I am. When she says, "I don't want to own anything until I find a place where me and things go together. I'm not sure where that is but I know what it is like. It's like Tiffany's" that was the part that made that movie my all time favorite. in those few sentences Holly captured how I feel about my search to find my purpose and my struggle with depression. I don't want to make any big commitments until I find the place that I am supposed to be. I don't know where that is but I have had tastes of what it feels like. I have had tastes of true happiness and purpose in life and I want to find that again. I want to learn to love who I am and have the confidence to take on the world. So why don't you join me on my journey to find a place like Tiffany's. It won't be easy but it'll be worth it when I get there and when I finally do arrive I will have found the place where me and things go together, and just maybe sharing my story can help others find their places too.